Make Smart Snack Decisions

It may surprise you to learn that I take sports very seriously. While I dedicate a good number of my days to checking trap lines and tending my jerky smoker, I’m a man of many hobbies. So you can probably imagine that when football Sunday rolls around, I don’t mess around. And I hate to say it, but in the game of smart snacks, I’ve been burned before.

Imagine this scenario: It's football Sunday, and you've invited a few friends over to your secluded mountain cabin to watch the games (I just got cable). The TV is tuned to the pregame coverage, the drinks are cold, and everyone is settling in for a full day of sports, socializing, and of course, snacks.

Because your friends are thoughtful people, they didn't arrive empty-handed. Each person brought their own contribution to the snack table:

• Bill brought a giant bag of chips.
• Geoff showed up with cookies.
• For some reason, Ralph brought celery sticks.
• Jenny arrived with a bag of Old Trapper Beef Jerky.

Now, you may already feel the tension in the room from that list of snacks alone. Which of these four different snacks do you choose? While it might seem obvious, I don't want to leave a decision this important to chance. You may take me as more of a philosopher than a scientist, but when it comes to the art of snacking, I believe that precision and care are worth every effort. That's why I had Old Trapper scientists design this handy flowchart you can use as a step-by-step guide for your future snack decisions.

Smart Snack Contender 1: Bill’s Chips

Chips have been a staple of parties and sporting events for generations, and Bill is following in the footsteps of that tradition. I’m a fan of tradition myself, as my insistence on using real wood in my smoker might suggest—but in this case, I’m not quite on board. The problem with chips is that they have a habit of disappearing almost instantly, and leaving you with oily fingers and a vague sense of regret. They’re not filling, and they’re not giving your body any kind of fuel. Not exactly a smart snack in my book.

Smart Snack Contender 2: Cookies

There’s nothing wrong with the occasional sweet treat. I’d hardly have trailblazed my teriyaki beef jerky if I wasn't a fan of a little complex sweetness. But let’s think critically about Geoff’s cookies in this situation. Firstly, it's difficult to channel the intensity of a fourth-quarter comeback while nibbling on a dessert that reminds you of elementary school lunch boxes. But more important is the sinister undertone to Geoff’s offering: the looming threat of the dreaded sugar crash. Eat too many cookies (and really, who has the self-control to stop), and you’ll be ready to pass out. What I’m saying is, Geoff is basically trying to poison you. Don’t trust Geoff.

Smart Snack Contender 3: Celery

Then there's Ralph's celery. We want to be respectful because Ralph means well. Celery has its place: but not on the snack table. Nobody has ever leaped off the couch after a game-winning touchdown and celebrated with a handful of celery sticks. Ralph may not appreciate hearing this, but the smart snack facts simply aren't on his side.

Smart Snack Contender 4: Jenny's Beef Jerky

Now we're talking. Jenny understood the assignment. While everyone else showed up with snacks that are either gone in ten minutes, loaded with sugar, or suspiciously vegetable-shaped, Jenny brought beef jerky. That's the kind of forward thinking that wins championships. Beef jerky delivers real flavor, satisfying protein, and enough substance to carry you through four quarters, overtime, and at least three arguments about questionable officiating. Jenny didn't just bring a snack: Jenny brought a solution. Jenny is this get-together's first ballot hall of famer.

So What Exactly Makes a Good Smart Snack?

A smart snack isn’t just something that tastes good in the moment. It needs to hold up under pressure on football Sundays, road trips, late-night work sessions, or any time your body is asking for fuel that actually helps you function instead of crashing out.

I’ve heard the words “clean eating” tossed around quite a bit in recent decades. It may surprise you to learn that I like the idea. Despite being familiar with the dirt and grime of the trail, food itself should be clean, simple, and genuinely nourishing—like high-quality beef jerky that focuses on protein and flavor without all the extra stuff. That’s what makes a smart snack in my book.

Why Beef Jerky Is The Best Smart Snack

One of my most important questions on the flowchart asks if you want the very best. I hope that you’re willing to answer with the self-assurance you deserve. Great jerky delivers the kind of satisfying flavor that keeps people coming back for another piece. You don’t just go into the big game settling for second best. What kind of winning attitude would that be?

Plus, it’s not like football is a quick event. There’s the pregame coverage, the game itself, the postgame analysis, the days of agonizing despair when your team loses… the ideal protein snack needs to keep up with the action. Old Trapper beef jerky was made for exactly those situations. It’s hearty, it’s delicious, it’s great fuel for your body, and will without a doubt make you the most popular person at the watch party. So really, how is there any competition?

The Science of Bringing People Together

One of the most fascinating discoveries I made during the development of my flowchart was the social impact of great beef jerky. Not only does it increase the inherent popularity of whoever contributed it, but it also brings people together. I refer to this phenomenon as enhanced snack-based social engagement (ESBSE). Most football fans simply call it common sense. Either way, the result is the same: great snacks create memorable experiences, and memorable experiences often include Old Trapper.