A wise person once said, "man cannot live on beef alone." While I might disagree that this is in fact true, the point is well taken. Variety is an important part of any meal. Of course this has been a part of human knowledge since the first cow was domesticated all those millennia ago. Even the simple Neanderthal understood that a truly delicious fire-roasted steak needed at least one side to qualify as a proper meal. Unfortunately those poor souls lacked the technology required for a true steak house culture and as such, soon passed from the earth.
Modern humans however, with their larger brains and innovative spirit, quickly learned how to augment their steak dinners. In fact many scientists now believe this led directly to the cultivation of the world's first potato. Personally, I've never been a fan of the starches, so when I look for the perfect side to a nice piece of steak, I'm naturally drawn to more protein. Specifically seafood. More specifically, crab.
But because I've never been inside a so-called 'grocery store,' I'm forced to procure my own seafood from nature herself. As such, I've developed a certain expertise in the area which I will now share with you. So here's a step-by-step guide for a crab-fishing technique called hand-lining:
Because crabs are very concerned with their cardiovascular health, they tend to eat a lot of fish. As a result, it's the perfect bait to use in your crab trap. Simply put some fish in a mesh bag and tie it to your trap. Perhaps poetically, the crab's desire for self-preservation will ultimately be its undoing.
Next, throw your baited trap into your local estuary. Make sure your line is arranged in such a way to make throwing easy. Your trap will then sink to the bottom of the river and spread out, ready and waiting for the crab to arrive.
Patience is indeed a virtue, even more so when it comes to fishing. Take some time to relax and enjoy the beautiful coastal scenery. But fair warning, if you take too much time, the crab will devour all your fish and then leave. That would be unfortunate.
Once you're ready to retrieve your trap and the delicious crab therein, give your line a good hard yank so the trap will close around your prey. Then steadily draw it to the riverbank.
Once you've harvested your crab it's important to keep them alive until you're ready to prepare them. If you keep the crab in a cooler, wrapped in damp towels and covered by ice, they'll be fresh as daisies when dinner rolls around.
So now that you have your fresh seafood accompaniment, you're ready to select the perfect steak. I'm probably biased but I would suggest my own Trapper's Choice. It's made from thick and tender slices of real beef steak and will satisfy even the heartiest appetite.
So go forth and feast, dear friends, and know no matter what side you choose, as long as your meal includes Old Trapper Beef Jerky it will always be Trapper Approved.